You are my son, my moon and my stars

fullsizerenderIt has been an emotional few weeks .

A little back story, back in 2004 Ayden suffered a brain injury that was caused by an infection that took over one side of his brain. He was in critical condition but with prayer and Ayden being the strong boy he is, he over came it at all. Yea he had to relearn the ability to walk, talk, eat etc. but that was the last of our concerns the important part was Ayden was awake. After taking about two years of therapy he was back where he should be at his age and recovered. Now that he started school his teachers has been concerned about his inability to focus for longer periods of time. Which me as HIS mother, I know Ayden his a happy boy, energetic, incredibly happy. It never became much of a concern until his teachers advised me to take him to his Dr. specially because of his extensive medical history. After visiting Ayden’s neurologist he has been diagnosed with ADHD, which kids who suffer from any brain injuries are more likely to get ADHD (Attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder.) Don’t get me wrong there is a lot of people out there with ADHD it is very common, but when someone tells you YOUR child has ADHD and you feel like your child is being labeled you become defensive, confused, sad, all these emotions i can’t even  explain because all I am thinking is about Ayden.

The last thing a mother wants is someone labeling your child or be seen different than anyone else. Like his Doctor explains, he will eventually outgrow it, but what about the mean time? How will I make sure his teachers are showing him the patience he needs, giving him that little extra attention he needs. How will I know he isn’t being treated different when I am not around. As a mother all you want to do is protect your kids from anything that can cause him any harm, sadness or neglect. When you feel that power is being taken away from you it breaks you inside. I want to be there for him, like I have been since he was baby. There comes a time when you can’t, you can’t be there every minute of the day to make sure they are ok. I guess this is the time where it is my time to grow and believe everything is going to be ok.

As if I wasn’t filled with mixed emotions already, then came the talk about medicating or not medicating, side effects and other alternatives. For now we will opt-out on the medication and do every other alternative possible. I can’t see myself medicating my five year old son on a daily basis because he is a little more active than other kids. Makes me only doubt my decisions as a mother and I wonder if I’m making the right decisions for him, when at times us as adult we can’t even make a rational decision when it pertains to us.

Love never gives up, Never loses Faith, Is always hopeful and endures all things.

1 Corinthians 13:7



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